worthy

also from june, 2007.

random ideas, random thoughts, and i can't get them all to mean anything that i want them to. i type because it's better for me, i can take my time and not waste other peoples', i can write what i cannot seem to get my mouth to say.

on a totally different note, i want everyone to know that i am worth it. maybe i didn't think i was at one time, but i do now. i won't settle for second fiddle. i am not the backup plan, or plan c for when the backup fails, i am not the cavalry, i am not the reinforcements, i am not the mother, i am not the shrink, i am not the dregs of the coffeepot, i am not that one tiny piece of cake left. i am worth being the first thought in someone's mind when they wake up. i am worth someone leaving their comfort zone to talk to me, to get to know me, to fall for me. i am worth losing a little bit of "coolness" to hang out with me. i am worth some sacrifice. i am worth someone wanting to talk to me for hours, and missing me when i'm not there. i am worth thunderbolts and chills, fireworks and melts. i am worth a partnership, an equal partnership. i am worth finding that someone, and feeling the same way about them as they do me. most importantly, i am worth that.

see what happens when i can write.